4 boneless skinless Chicken Breasts
2 shallots, chopped
1 package of button mushrooms, sliced (reduce to a 1/2 of package if mushrooms make your husband gag)
1 clove of garlic, sliced
1 T olive oil
1 cup of plain soy milk (use milk if your husband isn't lactose intolerant)
1/2 cup water
4 T butter or lower fat substitute
1T basil
1 cup dry white wine
Salt and Pepper
1/2 box of angel hair pasta
1 - 6 oz bottle of formula
1 sick, fussy baby, preferably with a fever
1 mL syringe
1 mL of generic tylenol, red in color
Preheat oven to 350
Clean 4 chicken breasts and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Place 2 T of melted butter and sliced garlic in baking pan. Coat chicken breasts in melted butter and arrange in pan. Pour 1/2 cup of wine over chicken and cook for 45 minutes or until done...or in this case, well done.
In saute pan, heat olive oil. Add shallots and mushrooms. Cook for 3 mins or until mushrooms are nicely golden and smell amazing. Remove from pan and set aside.
Grab fussy baby and sit in glider chair with formula. Proceed to fight with crying baby who refuses to eat. Spray formula all over self, baby's face and wall in an effort to get a few drops into babies mouth. Continue this for 30 minutes. Yell out to husband to fill the pasta pot with water and put on stove. Continue to try to soothe screaming child. 2 oz may have been eaten by now. Start to loose sanity, ask husband to take over so that you may finish dinner. Pass crying, thrashing baby to father/husband and take baby's temperature. Go get infant tylenol.
Chicken should be done now. Cover with foil and turn oven off. This should dry the chicken out very nicely. Return to baby's room.
Have husband pin insane child down, easily place syringe in crying mouth and shoot tylenol in. Child will get even more hysterical and start coughing and heaving. Sit her upright. Father/husband working hard to soothe. Child should hiccup and then throw up tylenol and 2 oz of now red formula all over father/husband/saint. Immediately loose appetite. Scoop baby up and usher her to changing table and strip her down, wipe her off and clothe her. Have husband rock until she falls asleep.
Cook pasta according to package directions.
In skillet melt remaining butter, add wine, water, soy milk, basil and any juice from the chicken pan. Bring to a boil and reduce until thicker. Salt and pepper to taste.
Plate pasta, top with chicken breast and mushrooms (to the mushroom lover's plate only) and top with white sauce. Ignore the fact that you have no appetite and 'enjoy'.
Look at husband wearily, wondering what the night has in store.
