tidbits, bites, and boots.

I have had random thoughts and moments of,"OH, I should blog about that...the world needs to know what quirky tid-bits are coming to mind."  So...world...you are in luck!  Wait.  I'm sorry, what?  You mean the world isn't reading my blog? 

On the way to the grocery store yesterday I passed a board with all sorts of local advertisements.   This was my favorite.

"How much expertise?", I think.    Based on this sign I will turn over my W2 and my social security number and bank account information.  Please, where do I sign up?  Maybe payment is only my first born.  

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Please take a close look at this picture below.  

This is what my pizza came in.  Someone should be shot.

I 'argue' with the husband weekly on whether we should be ordering pizza AGAIN.  He would like to have it every other day.  I would like to have it every other week.  (not because I don't like it.  I'm just the only one with some restraint)  We settle on about once a week.  The BOX doesn't help.  

So, tell me, Mr. Ab Rocket, do I use the ab rocket for 5 minutes WHILE I'm eating my pizza? Or, do I wait at least a half hour after I'm done to avoid cramping?  

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I made myself a little tasty treat the other day, to off set the Busting Pizza Abs.  I thought I would share.  

 

1 Amy's California Veggie Burger

1/4 avocado

1/2 cup spinach

3 or 4 broccoli twigs

3 or 4 cauliflower bushes

1 flour tortilla (i prefer whole wheat but we didn't have any)

This was delicious.  Warning...if eating around Mickey (cat), he likes veggie burgers.  He will try to eat your face off to get to it.

2 days later I made another wrap...Veggie burger, avocado and granny smith apple. Also delectable. 

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And last but not least, as promised...boots.  

Can You Hear Me Now???

I left the apartment today without my cell phone.  I didn't realize it until I got downtown.   "Crap!  How will I stay connected to my life!?!  I have to call Crista later to see if we are going to meet.  Jay wants me to call him before I come home.  Wait...I can use my work blackberry."  Nope...that is at home as well.  I truly am electronic-less.   A bit of panic set in...

"Ok, It's not a big deal" I said to myself.  "I can do this.  I can use a pay phone today.  Shit, I only have 1 quarter.  Is that even enough these days?  I haven't used a pay phone in years.  It's probably like $.50!  WHY DID I HAVE TO LEAVE MY CELL PHONE AT HOME!"

I had to keep giving myself a pep talk.  "Ok, I don't need to worry about it now.  I have errands to run.  Let's do those first and then worry about what to do later.  I can enjoy this day of being unreachable.  I'm free!"

I would like to say that I felt entirely free of my phone.  I wasn't.  I had this small pit in my stomach all afternoon.  Sad, right?!  

I made one phone call with my one quarter.  Pay phones are still $.25!  Amazing.  With the price of postage soaring up and the cost of using an ATM...I thought Alexander Graham Bell would jump on the band wagon.  

I called Jay.  The connection was fuzzy, but I felt better knowing that I had reached someone!  I wish I was exaggerating, but I am not.  The first thing he said to me was..."Where are you calling from."  My response was "A PAY PHONE! Can you believe it?!?!?"  I asked him to text Crista to give her a heads up.  At that point Ms. Recorded Operator came on to say, "Please deposit another quarter for 4 minutes."  

"Oh My GOD!"  my brain screamed.  I don't have any more.  I start yelling into the phone, "Jay, can you hear me???  Can you hear me???"  Ms. Recorded Operator is still demanding another quarter.  I hear Jay in the back ground saying, "I can hear you."  I tell him I love him and I will see him when I get home.   We lose connection.

How did I do this before?  In 1999 I did not have a cell phone.  How did I survive?  How did I meet people during the day?  How did I find people I lost in the store?  How did I make last minute plans to have tea with a friend when I found myself in their neighborhood?  HOW DID I KNOW WHAT TIME IT WAS?  It all perplexes me.  

Through out my travels today I had to ask people what time it was.  I was meeting some friends at 2:30 and wasn't wearing a watch.  Over a period of 3 hours I asked 5 people what time it was.  3 of those people looked at their cell phones to tell me the time.

I found myself twice waiting in line and went to reach for my cell phone to make "use" of the "free" time I had.  I truly am plugged in and tuned out.  I am out of touch with my self.  How did I become this person that needs internet on my cell phone?  When did I become the person that needs to text someone immediately?  Everywhere I walk I see people plugged in to their phones, their ipods, their pda's, their iphones.  That is me.  Very rarely do I ride the subway without listening to music AND reading at the same time.  Heaven forbid I just sit on the train listening and watching what is going on around me.  Heaven forbid I listen to my own thoughts...

So, the good news.  I survived without connection for 6 hours today.  I used a pay phone.  I talked to 5 strangers.  I used my friends phone to call Crista.  I listened to my own thoughts and it was all ok.  I'm sad to say it was uncomfortable, but for the first time in a long time, I was actually awake and aware every place I stood.  

Bone China

As I left work tonight I have noticed a change in the air.  Cold, crisp and the holiday shoppers are out.  There are Christmas Tree's on sidewalks waiting to be taken home and dressed up. The stores are decked bright and shiny.  Bloomingdales has strung a million lights outside the city block wide building.  Victoria's Secret Flagship Store has had it's grand opening and the line to get in is out the door.  

The holiday's are upon us and it is in the air.  

As I strolled to the subway, enjoying the lights, I passed a shop that sells 'Authentic Chinese Art"  Something caught my eye and I gasped as I passed.  I did not gasp out in joy...more like fear.  I hope I am not offending anyone but this "Fine Bone China Figure" FREAKED ME OUT...

...ummmmm, what is that???  Here is a closer look...

What the hell is that?  Seriously.  I have enough night terrors!  Can you imagine THAT on my nightstand breathing it's octopus breath on me?  And are those really octopi? 

Octopi...Octopuses...Octopi...Octopuses

Also...are they trying to kill the Chinese man or are they his friends?  They have 'friendly' faces. And by 'friendly', I mean in a clown like creepy way.  A clown with a really long nose...or an octopus with a really long nose.  what??

Who knows.

One thing I know for sure...I won't be surprised if my night terror's tonight include a Chinese Man screaming angry words at me while octopi with creepy clown faces are trying to strangle me.  

Ahhhhh, sweet dreams.

A Tail of the Turkey Thief

We spoil our cats Mickey and Bean.  I hate to admit it, but it's true.  So, in true fashion, we decided to share our Thanksgiving with the beasts.  We shredded up some turkey breast and shared in the festivities.

Well...apparently, that wasn't enough for Mick...

"You're holding out on me!"

"I smell more turkey"

 

"I think this might be a better angle."

"JACKPOT!  Thank God they haven't trimmed my claws like the keep promising!"

Needless to say, Mick won out on the thievery.  I valued my face more than getting the turkey back.  Now, if you will excuse me, it sounds like Mick is tearing up aluminum foil.  Apparently he likes left over dinner rolls...

far from sleepy

You know you're tired when at 6:45 am you pass a homeless man sleeping in a sleeping bag on the ground...and you're jealous.

Cabrini Blvd

Needed a break.  My head has been murky lately and I had to get out.  Strapped on my shoes...threw my camera over my shoulder...and headed north on Cabrini Blvd.  The views always surprise me...even after 10 years of living here.

--hudson river

--the jokes on them...

--hudson river

--george washington bridge

--continuing on cabrini

--fort tryon park: entrance to heather gardens.  i'm not lying.  that is what it's called

--seems like it might be spring...

--tall and stark

--reminds me of a spider web

Is the grass greener?

...apparently it is.  Just ask my cats.

Every morning we feed Mick and Josie a 1/2 of can of wet food.  They both get the same thing. If one gets chicken...they both get chicken.  If one gets turkey and salmon, they BOTH get turkey and salmon.  

So tell me, why do they start out eating their own food but end up eating each others when the their sibling is out of the room?  Why do they start eating their sibling's food when they haven't even come close to finishing their own???  Apparently they each think the grass is greener on the other side...or the food is more savory out of a bowl other than their own...

I often get the "grass is greener" syndrome when I am at a restaurant.  Some how the husband's food is ALWAYS better than mine...I just didn't think feline experienced it as well.  

"Feed me and no one gets hurt"

 - Mickey Mantle

"WOMAN!  Why is my dinner NOT cooking?!?"

 - Josie aka Bean